1. Ageing is Damned Hard Work!

Hibiscus from Grey Lynn Gardens

As two over-75-year-olds  we’ve become very aware of the challenges of ageing!  Instead of writing about the arts and other interesting aspects of our current privileged lives, we’ve decided to be forthright about some of the issues  we face, and our attempts to manage them creatively.   We are keen to make sure we keep body, mind and spirit as healthy as possible as we age, and can only do this if we’re honest about the changes we need to make in our lives.  Autumn is here, in Aotearoa, obviously  an appropriate time to write about the autumn of our lives, too!

Talking about it…

Of course talking with each other  about the changes going on in our minds and bodies is crucial.  For us, after 36 years as mates, and 29 of living together, it’s only too easy to take each other for granted,  or  become grumpy as we no longer feel the same confidence in ourselves and our abilities. So we’re actively discussing with each other , and with friends and family members of a similar age or stage, some of the challenges of the ageing journey.  This seems especially important for us as a lesbian couple, without big families around us .  In this process  we have shared some hearty laughter at our increasing foibles and fragility.  Talking honestly about our issues- and laughing-  brings the two of us closer together, too.

We think our newsletter readers might also have a chuckle or more at our efforts!


  1. Elisabeth Degremont says

    Thank you Tanya and Charmaine for your always inspiring newsletter s. This one particularly of course as we all face similar challenges and issues ! Hope to see you soon .. Much love

  2. Kia ora korua

    This is such a great idea. I’ve always thought of myself as a basically healthy person, but the last 18 months have made me do a rethink, and I find it very valuable to hear of other people’s experiences. Paul and I are doing a Brainfit course in the Grey Lynn Community Centre during May, but it costs. [https://brainfit.nz].

    A friend of mine is on medicinal mariijuana for sciatic pain, and reports it has practically stopped her anxiety. Maybe there is room for a cottage industry here?

  3. Kia ora Charmaine and Tanya,
    You two are so inspiring ! Thanks for the newsletters and as your neighbour let me know if either of you ever need a hand with anything. I know you have a large loving circle of friends but just putting my hand up and saying you-hoo 🙂
    You would make a great blog on ageing …if you’re interested let me know .


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